I have never had the knack that many do for gift giving. I work really hard to pick gifts and I am rarely confident in giving them. Is it too commercial? Hippie? Young? Old? Irrelevant? The list goes on. We are a family on a budget and I am fairly strict about sticking to it… I definitely could be stricter but that’s a whole other can of worms. Anyways, as a family on a budget, that means we need to be thoughtful about who we are gifting to and what we are gifting. Issy and I both have fairly large families and tons of friends and that can often come with budgeting problems when holiday shopping. So, here are some of my guidelines for gift giving and a look at what could possibly be in my family’s stockings this year.
The past two years have been very expensive ones for us and so we try to be thoughtful about all gift buying. A lot of our friends and families don’t need gifts for the sake of getting gifts and we don’t like to give people things just for the sake of checking off a list. That’s not what the season is about and honestly, wasting money just to say you bought someone something is not what we are about… ever. Because of this, I am probably seen as a very inconsistent gifter. Some years, I see something and am moved to purchase it for someone… and then that person or family might not get something from us for another couple of years… and to me, that’s ok. At some point, you have to be realistic about gifts and getting gifts. I don’t want to receive something if it’s not truly from the heart… you can begin to tell when you are just a name to be checked off a list. So…
Guidelines:
- Keep it real. Meaning- be realistic. Set your budget. Write down everyone you would want to give a gift to and then write out your ideas. Do some research. Price it out. Then, decide what’s realistic and reevaluate. Do this until you feel good about that list. If you don’t feel good about it in terms of authenticity, price, etc., then just don’t. Figure out something else.
- If you are trying to buy gifts for a family, maybe try looking at gifts for the whole family to enjoy. OR look for a gift that the adults can share and then a gift for any potential kiddos to enjoy together. This can help keep your budget on track and keep the stress levels down of buying for too many people. I love consolidating gifts this way.
- Know your audience. For example, we don’t like a ton of stuff. And the stuff we do like, we are very picky about. So buying housewares and clothing is always risky for us. But wine? Heck, yeah. We will gladly take a bottle of wine. Dish towels? YES, PLEASE. My dad loves cool art things, so I am always trying to pick something he can hang up on his wall or utilize in his home office. My husband is someone who buys what he wants for himself as he sees it. Waiting for Christmas just isn’t his thing, so as a result, I don’t get him big Christmas gifts but I do fill up on stocking stuffers for him- gum, candy, shaving things, etc. That’s joyful for him to open.
- Simplicity is key. We don’t want to buy everyone multiple things… my mom is probably rolling over in her grave right now! She loved to give people a few things to open. She loved that… she loved picking gifts for people. Sorry mama, but I don’t. I like to focus on one thing (maybe two). This can be per person or per family depending on the list. It’s a bit harder when you aren’t doing smaller things but that’s also the intentionality behind the way we gift- simplicity.
And look, trying to buy for everyone can get exhausting. This is where the art of the holiday card comes in. I love cards; all cards! Photo or regular ole’ cards- I love receiving them. In recent years, sending out holiday cards has become the main way that we manage to stay in touch with our friends and family all over the world. Early last week I sent our holiday cards off to Spain. They arrived today- well at least one family got theirs already. Sometimes something in the mail and a quick update be it letter, a short scribble, or a photo is enough.
Gift Essentials/Ideas:
“Essentials” differ from person to person. So the following is relevant to the people in my life.
As I stated above, stocking stuffers are most important to my husband. This year, his stocking will have some grooming items and snacks for work- even though he is WFH, he still needs his own snacks because I don’t like him taking mine!
Extended family members will be getting either gift cards, local gift baskets from Vermont companies (gotta support the local businesses), or a 2 or 3 month subscription box off of Cratejoy.com. Cratejoy is amazing. They have everything from tea subscription boxes to book boxes to food boxes… the list goes on… like really, they have date nights in a box, CBD boxes, and boxes of items for the bedroom (cough cough you know what I mean cough cough). My favorite thing about Cratejoy is that they also have boxes to fit most any budget.
** I am not paid to say any of that- I just really like them!
In the past, I have done handmade gifts for friends and neighbors. This year, it just seemed too difficult (thanks, Covid-19) to make that happen while trying to keep people as safe as possible. So, that’s where a bottle of something at someone’s doorstep or simply just scheduling a Zoom call for cocktails, coffee, or tea is going to come in to play. One of my favorite parts of the holiday are the holiday parties! And since that’s out of the question, what I really want is just a moment to connect with the people I care about. 2020 has been… a trip… or should I say lack of a trip? It’s been different. It’s been stressful. Let’s make sure that we try and connect in a safe manner with the people we love. The gifts are just stuff. Stuff that we don’t need to beat ourselves up about. But taking the time to say “Hey” or “I love you?” That’s what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown.
