So last week, I blogged about prepping for house guests! With the world opening up, gathering together is going to be a thing again! If you are hosting, check out my tips and tricks for preparing for friends and family. IF you are the friend or family member visiting, let me give you some ideas on how to be a good guest… and therefore, be welcomed back again!
The first thing you need to identify is: WHY are you visiting someone? Is it for pleasure? Is there a purpose? For example, are you going to take care of someone who is sick? Visiting a new baby? Hanging with friends? The reason for your visit will dictate much of your trip. Let’s dive in to a few different scenarios and identify some good tips for being not just a good house guest, but a freaking GREAT one.
Trip Purpose: Caring for Your Grandmother, Sick Relative/Friend, etc.
When caring for anyone who is elderly or sick can be difficult. This isn’t always a super fun trip but more a trip of agency. In most cases, you aren’t really the guest but the caregiver. As such, you need to have a full understanding of the person’s situation. Is someone sick with cancer? Elderly? Dementia? Get educated on everything you can. Ask questions. When you get there, jump into helping with meals, cleaning, laundry, etc. Be considerate. Cook nutritious meals. It’s amazing what eating well can do for a person’s health both physically and mentally. Clean up after meals. Maintain order and a routine. While this might be a bit boring, it is most helpful to whoever is sick or in need of care. Get the numbers of all doctors and keep them taped up somewhere in case you need contact them. Know where the local pharmacy is. Ask where they like to get their hair cut or nails done and help them make appointments. This bit of normalcy makes a huge difference when someone has or is loosing a bit of their independence. My last bit of advice here is to NOT ADD TO THE MESS. Set the boundary with yourself that you are in someone else’s space. Respect it. Clean it. Don’t stockpile on things. Keep it simple.
Trip Purpose: Visiting Friends or Family
Excited to actually hug someone you love? Yeah, I think we all relate. When visiting someone, ask if there is anything you can bring. Check to see if they have any plans that might require things like extra cold/warm weather items. Do you need to reserve a spot for rock climbing or can you look into a bike rental? HOW can you help them prepare for YOU! Once there, help out a bit. Take your dishes to the sink, try and keep your space somewhat tidy. Respect the space you are in. You don’t need to go all “me” and clean up everything every day, but you do need to read your host. Are they struggling to get all the dishes washed? Do they need help taking the dog out? A lot of things will depend on HOW long you are staying. If you are only staying a few days, just try to be present and in the moment and ask what you can do on your way out. I love it when guests strip their beds and form a pile of used sheets and towels. This makes it easy for me to drop everything in the washer. My dad (depending on his flight time) will even start the load of linens for me. He understands my OCD heart. If you are staying for 3-5 days, pitch in with dishes. If you are staying beyond 5 days, ask what your host needs. Do they like linens washed once a week? I do. Can you contribute to the grocery bill? Help watch the kids while your host(s) make dinner? Water some plants? Actually make a meal? To put it simply, ask and then be willing to jump in. We usually don’t ask for a lot… maybe watching the kiddo while I cook dinner. BUT I do like to be asked. It shows you are considerate and understand that we are trying to make your trip a fun one.
Trip Purpose: A New Baby
There is a new little human in your life. Whether you are a friend or family, this is a BIG event! It’s also a really beautiful time for a family and they may want to share that joy with you. Remember, this visit isn’t so much about entertaining you… What I mean is, don’t expect your host(s) to be up making breakfast, whipping out some lunch, and creating a Michelin star dinner for you. In fact, you should really be helping out here. Pitch in. The parent(s) do not need you to hold the baby 24/7. Believe it or not, that is RARELY helpful. In fact, this is a time that is so essential for baby to bond with their humans. Start some laundry? Make a dinner? Help with clean up before you go? Play with another kiddo in the household? YES. YES. YES. YES. Something else to consider is (coming out of a pandemic) if the people you are visiting care about vaccines or not. Personally, I do. You may not and that’s fine. But the question you need to ask is if your hosts care and what you can do. Babies have super low immune systems at the beginning. They can get deathly sick from a kiss if you have a cold sore… SO, ask. For example: We care. If you are going to be visiting, I would prefer you be vaccinated with the COVID, flu, and TDAP vaccines. If you are looking to debate me on this- go ahead. I will not be engaging. Are you sick with a bad cold? Reschedule your trip. From my perspective, I have just worked my butt off to keep this baby safe and healthy and that feeling doesn’t go away. With the world opening up again, I do understand that there are still going to be risks and exposures… I don’t need to add to if you are going to be spending multiple days in my home. There is no such thing as full proof… I know. This is just our line of defense in these early and precious days of our newborn.
Whatever you are traveling for and wherever you are traveling to, assess the situation. Everyone is different and has different needs or wants. Do you want to just relax at your friend’s house? Do you want to get out and go leaf peeping (yes, this is a thing)? Be honest with your host so that they can properly prepare for your stay. Notice a cool restaurant you want to try? Mention it! Once there, enjoy seeing whoever it is you are seeing. After two years, we are all ready for a little connection. Also be prepared that people might be a bit changed. Did your BFF usually want to go out and go crazy for a night? Maybe they aren’t ready yet. Don’t pressure them. You can still have a wild night in. Are you all ready to get out and go DO stuff? So are others! See if you need reservations anywhere… for dinner, bikes… a camp spot, etc.
Stay safe and have fun!
The Salty Exchange 