Self care should not be rare. Self care should not be rare. I have been repeating this little rhyme to myself for the past month. It’s become my mantra. I never understood the hype of the new year or resolutions. As stated in a previous blog, I find my rebirth and goal setting time to be most therapeutic in the fall. Specifically, at the start of the academic year. That’s my jam. That’s where I feel hope and the beginnings of rebirth. So, it is with great humility that I share that I have made a new year’s resolution.
Let’s back this up… My dad came to VT to spend about 4 months with my sister and I. He was in our bubble for the holiday season and was able to spoil his granddaughter rotten. With his visit, I realized that I had put “self care” on the back burner… like the way back burner… like back behind the burner and up past the backyard and main road and in the woods burner. The last time I was truly good at self care was probably 2015-2017ish. I was consistent with reading books, meditating, sleeping 8 hours a night, getting pedicures, and utilizing my monthly massage membership perks. Then, we moved and I readjusted that routine to other things like reflection, travel, and time with my husband. And then… I had a baby.
Suddenly, my time was, and is still, no longer just my own. I have a little human to grow. I can’t exactly slack. I want to help grow her into a big human… who is decent and kind. And with that, taking care of myself just became a selfish thing to indulge in (in my brain). With my dad here, I was able to do a few simple things while he took care of Rosemary. These few things became a wake up call. Getting a pedicure? Heaven. Getting a massage? Epic. Taking a nap when I felt sleepy? Necessary. Last year, I started taking steps to better take care of myself. I have been in the gym consistently, eating well, and connecting with my husband more. These things are all good. Really good, actually. Now, it is time for the next step. Or should I say, it is time for a resolution… or resolutions…
I need to spend some time figuring out my skin… ever since growing my little human, my skin has been a wreck. I need time for a skin care routine and facials. Carrying a 26 pound child around and weight training is a perfect recipe for knots… so a massage is important every now and again. Losing myself in a novel is downright restorative… I need these things. I need to do these things so that I am capable of being a GOOD human… and therefore, a good mom and a good partner. I need to stop feeling bad when I ask Issy to help me with something… And this is so silly because my husband will JUMP at the opportunity to help me with things. He isn’t a passive partner or father… but I also realize that between him being a full time employee during the day and grad school student by night that he also needs rest and self care. So in my endeavors to take care of myself, I also need to encourage him to do the same. We can’t put taking care of ourselves off until my dad comes back to Vermont. We need to establish and implement new ways of caring for ourselves and of making it actually happen.
I need to get back into my head again and get to know myself. I have changed a lot in the past few years… my priorities, likes and dislikes, hopes, dreams… they’ve changed a bit. Shari and I recently had a big planning meeting for TSE and we’ve set some goals and made some promises to ourselves. In honor of our desire for authenticity, collaboration, and discovery, we are going to “go there.” Yup… you read that right. Nothing is off limits for us this year. We are going to talk about things. Self care? Yup. Relationships? Yup. The ever ongoing saga of “health” and weight? Yup. Politics and our belief in democracy being respected? YUP. And I may even write a little Valentine’s Day post… because we all know what happens on Valentine’s Day. So stop blushing. Come along with us… let’s chat. What’s on your mind?
The Salty Exchange 