Tradition. Traditions. They are important to our lives- especially around the holidays. Whether it’s a big meal with family or an ugly sweater party with your closest friends, this year is a game changer for everyone. The holidays bring out a beautiful and sentimental side to people. The month of December is like a blanket of hope and generosity of spirit.
My mom and grandma did traditions well. Decorating the trees, making Mexican Christmas cookies, shopping for gifts, hot cocoa… I miss those days. I miss the smell of it. As I got older, things changed and not all in bad ways. Life can’t stay the same! Neither can traditions. After my mom passed, we felt a little lost in terms of traditions… we never really got it “right.” There was a certain amount of pressure and shame (for me) that I couldn’t do it all the same way. Sure, we tried and we got some things right. Over time, we were okay with letting certain things go and modifying others. It was liberating to discover that we didn’t have to decorate the Christmas tree the exact same way! We got to play with the holiday season and try to figure out how to make it fun again… make it happy again.
I feel like the Christmas of 2017 was the one that I finally started to see what I wanted the holiday to be. My husband and I were in Spain and my father-in-law was in town for Christmas. It was… simple. We watched our favorite movies, made different kinds of delectable sweets, socialized with friends, and made a Christmas Eve feast that was ON POINT. We kept the pressure low. That has very much been the key to us being happy during the season. We mostly just want to be happy- so we do the things that make us happy. We have been open to change- something that I think has made us fairly comfortable during this… crazy… year.
This year, we have my dad with us. He’s been here in Vermont since September. We’ve decorated our home, are slowly purchasing gifts and last minute stocking stuffers, and are about to begin an intense week of baking cookies. This is also our second year of doing a Christmas puzzle. Settling down with a glass of wine or a cup of tea and focusing on a puzzle has proven to be a soothing pastime for me. It’s not just Issy and I anymore. Rosemary has started to discover the magic of the season. She is learning about the holidays through books and her favorite, so far, is “Charlie Brown’s Christmas.” She is SO my grandmother’s great granddaughter. Rosemary is also discovering the joys of snow, the perils of things freezing over, and the delights of cake pops shaped like snowmen from Starbucks. I very much want her to feel the same excitement and joy that I did as a kid. I want her to enjoy giving more than she does receiving. I want her to understand that this is the time of year where we open our wallets for not just gifts but for different causes… and sure!- this doesn’t have to be experienced only during the holidays, but it sure is a good time to show her the pleasure in giving to others.
On Friday I have grand plans of going out and finishing ALL shopping, getting a Christmas eye brow wax, and meandering over to the wine shop to get the wine for our Christmas day meal. That’s this year’s traditions. Maybe next year, things will be different? Traditions don’t really matter… What matters is being with the people who make traditions worth doing.
The Salty Exchange 